How to Spot an Abuser

No one knew

For the whole month of November, missionaries Jeremy and Liz Pinero and I took my four little "grand-angels" and lived up in the mountains of Big Bay in Vanuatu doing all the... well... jungle-stuff—like washing our clothes in the river, crouching over a fire to cook, doing without power or

By |2024-07-09T18:26:23+10:004 January, 2014|

Defining domestic violence

We all occasionally lose our tempers, but within a short time we realise the damage we've done and broken-heartedly ask for forgiveness and a restored relationship. Marital abuse is in a completely different universe. It is not an anger-problem, submission issue, or lack of good communication skills. Emotional/mental abuse is

By |2024-07-09T18:23:24+10:0013 January, 2014|

Cycle of abuse

Learning of the existence of this well-known pattern of behaviour is often a shock down to the very core of the abused's soul. When that passes, a wave of immeasurable relief sweeps over this wife feeling uniquely alone, isolated, and trapped. It is the confirmation of her sanity after all.

By |2024-07-09T18:23:23+10:0016 January, 2014|

Emotional and mental abuse

Like the tiny destructive termite in part one, a marriage can be destroyed by "a thousand little razor-cuts of perpetual contempt, put-downs, sarcasm, lies, rudeness, rages, insults and silent treatments, even though a physical mark is never left."1 Control As with physical violence, emotional and mental abuse has as its

By |2024-07-09T18:23:23+10:002 February, 2014|

Financial and spiritual abuse

So far, we've covered physical violence and the cycle of abuse, plus emotional/mental abuse. Another method an abuser uses to get and maintain control of his wife is... Financial abuse He may make her account for every dollar she spends, limit her access to money, and keep her in the

By |2024-07-09T18:23:23+10:006 February, 2014|

Spotting an abuser before you marry one

In the last five posts, we have covered physical and verbal abuse patterns, but this is, in concise form, how to spot an abuser before you marry one. "My boyfriend gets furious when I won't dump all my friends and spend all my time with him. I was so thrilled

By |2024-07-09T18:23:23+10:0012 February, 2014|
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