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Defining domestic violence
We all occasionally lose our tempers, but within a short time we realise the damage we've done and broken-heartedly ask for forgiveness and a restored relationship. Marital abuse is in a completely different universe. It is not an anger-problem, submission issue, or lack of good communication skills. Emotional/mental abuse is just as painful and will be covered later. Using physical force to harm or endanger another is assault (attempt/threat of violence) and battery (unlawful/unpermitted touching,
No one knew
For the whole month of November, missionaries Jeremy and Liz Pinero and I took my four little "grand-angels" and lived up in the mountains of Big Bay in Vanuatu doing all the... well... jungle-stuff—like washing our clothes in the river, crouching over a fire to cook, doing without power or running water or (gasp!) internet, riding in the moonlight frantically hanging on in the back of a truck fish-tailing through deep muddy ruts, taking cold
When you’ve been hurt: Common confusions
It would be imprudent of me to conclude this series without making some important clarifications to what I have said up to now. There are, unfortunately, a number of teachings about forgiveness in the modern church which do grievous harm. Several come to mind that I address here. Releasing vs. forgetting Forgiveness is letting go. It is not forgetting. I know this contradicts the practically canonical "forgive and forget," but it's true. In fact, the
When you’ve been hurt: The results of right choices
Healing. Sweetness. Joy. Edification. Humility. If you try to make this stuff happen, you will fail. The stuff I talk about here is the fruit. The root is the forgiveness, compassion, benevolence, and prayer we looked at in part one. Part one is the means. Part two is the ends. If you focus on pursuing the ends as an end in itself, they will elude you. But a biblical response to hurt leads to increasing...